love without agendas
Prompted by Judith P's post, I finally watched Rob Bell's 'Bullhorn' dvd (from the Nooma series) that's been sitting on my desk for ages!! Rob, in his own laid back style, sets out the kind of 'Jesus' love that would revolutionise the Church and mission. So much of our 'friendship evangelism' is precisely that - friendship with an ulterior motive. How many times have I heard in the past that I must have 'non-Christian' friends so that I can convert them?!
To this, Rob says "If I'm loving someone with an agenda then it isn't really love." He goes on to remind us that people need us (I presume that's followers of Jesus he's referring to by the 'us') to listen to their story, not to preach at them or try to convert them. How we love others is how we love God.
I guess this love is what stands behind Dream's desire to be open to all. We're not there to convert or even convince, but to provide resources and a space that will hopefully enable people to engage with Jesus and to see how he inhabits their story.
In doing so, we must live with and celebrate the loose ends, questions and differing points of view as we journey together with and towards Christ, never forgetting that we love because God first loves us. It's time we started trusting the God of love with each other, and loving for love's sake.
Malcolm C
posted by Dream at 4:01 PM
7 Comments:
I'm a big fan of Rob Bell's stuff although I haven't seen that particular Nooma DVD.
This sems a very delecate and difficult tension to me though rather than a simple "love has no agenda" statement. Some random thoughts..
-Isn't hoping to "enable people to engage with Jesus and to see how he inhabits their story" an agenda?
-Perhaps "agenda" is a loaded term as it implies "secret agenda"?
-I reckon God loves us with an agenda and I love my children with an agenda. So love can have an agenda in the sense of wanting the best for someone.
-At the same time it's disasterous in a peer level relationship, e.g. marriage or friendship to have a hidden 'agenda' of changing the person. Maybe too much of our 'friendship evangelism' (Yuk Yuk Yuk) has come from a patronising adult:child approach rather than co-equal friends.
-Jesus seems to have an agenda with those he relates too. At the same time though there's a free unconditional nature about his love.
So I guess I want friendships for their own intrinsic value. There's no secret reason for having the relationship. At the same time though I don't feel guilty that in a friendship, as I begin to care about someone I will want the best for them and will want to help them to find that.
3:38 PM
Richard, you're right that love has the agenda of wanting the best for the person who is loved. But, I guess I would argue that this 'agenda' is love - wanting the best is for someone is what love is about, so I wouldn't see that as an external agenda being hidden behind the act of loving. Am I just kidding myself?!
9:18 AM
I'm watching through the Nooma DVDs at the moment and saw Bullhorn yesterday. I think it's the least satisfying of the series so far and, curiously, the most preachy. I'm a bit disquieted by the way in which the visuals set up a contrast between 'cool' Rob Bell (whose book is advertised on lots of cool people's T-shirts in the DVD) and the definitely uncool Bullhorn guy - middle-aged with thinning hair, works in an office, etc.
And, strangely, at several points Rob Bell oversimplifies and, possibly, distorts the words of Jesus written in the gospels (for instance, omitting his 'go and sin no more' spoken to the woman caught in adultery). And if conversion is not part of the message, what do we make of the gospel of Mark's summary of Jesus' own preaching 'The kingdom of God is near. Repent and believe the good news'?
(I've already posted this on Richard's site but he asked me to post it here too where the primary discussion is being held.)
12:47 PM
Great post Mark, thanks for joining the discussion over here!!
I think your point about the visuals and how the 'bullhorn guy' is portrayed is a good one - it's a shame that the Nooma team felt they had to slip into these stereotypes (though, to be honest, the 'bullhorn-type' people I've witnessed do tend to fit this image anyway!)
In terms of Rob oversimplifying and 'distorting' the words of Jesus, I guess we all do that from time to time to back up our point. I'm not really interested in defending Rob Bell (I'm sure he can do that himself) but maybe his intention was to redress the imbalance. The 'sin no more' bit of that story with the woman caught in adultery is usually well recognised, but the grace with which Jesus dealt with her is often missed. I'm struck by the fact that Jesus didn't even look at the woman until the crowd had dispearsed as he didn't want to add to her shame (let's remember that she was most likely in a state of undress when she was dragged before him, as she was 'caught in the act'). It seems to me that Jesus' primary purpose in his dealing with this woman was to communicate love and acceptance. The challenge to change her lifestyle comes on the back of that.
The bit I'm most uncomfortable with in your post is the word 'conversion', not because I don't believe in lives radically changed by Christ (I do - mine is one of them), but because that's precisely what I do believe in - lives changed by Christ. So often we see the conversion of others as our goal rather than as Jesus', which leads to shallow friendships with 'non-Christians' that become driven towards the point where they 'accept Christ as Lord and Saviour' or 'pray the prayer', almost as if we can add another tick on our chart of 'souls saved'! I'm not into that (maybe I used to be) - I'm into building genuine friendships and, as part of that, introducing people to the central person in my life, Jesus, as naturally as I would introduce them to another of my friends. The pressure to 'convert' is not on me; the obligation to be loving and real is.
9:45 AM
Thanks for your comments Malcolm - I don't think there's any I would disagree with at all. I realise that many do leap to the 'sin no more', overlooking Jesus' grace and welcome to the woman; on the other hand, I have also heard this story used many times to illustrate Jesus' welcome to all without saying anything of the transformation he longs to bring to our lives (and which does involve turning away from sin). There has to be a balance which I think Rob Bell - in that particular DVD - didn't quite strike. (And I'm a big fan of the Nooma series, by the way.)
Conversion is now a loaded and difficult word and I can see why we might prefer not to use it. Yes, we all need to be converted all of the time - Jim Wallis' classic 'The Call to Conversion' is brilliant on this. And I do agree about establishing genuine friendships and not seeing others primarily as 'potential converts'. Yet, again, there has to be a balance. Sometimes I think there will be a need for urgency in what we say. Sometimes we might need to speak prophetically and robustly to people and powers. Not with a bullhorn, perhaps, and always aware of our own utter reliance on God's grace, but often at odds with any 'cool' or popular image we might hope to project to the world around us.
8:23 AM
Absolutely!! Couldn't agree more Mark - thanks!
10:03 AM
Thanks for the conversation! Oh, and I've just watched 'Lump' (Nooma 10) - which I think provides a really good balance to 'Bullhorn'. Good stuff.
1:34 PM
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